AHS Three Kids Walk Into the Woods

first_img Top Movie and TV Trailers You Might Have Missed This WeekAmerican Horror Story Takes Us Back to the Days of Witches and Warlocks Stay on target Well, I guess the showrunners also felt they were running out of people to kill in these last couple episodes because we start with footage from three characters we’ve never seen before. Three kids named Sophie, Milo, and Todd, who embody every millennial stereotype you can think of, are wandering through the woods looking for the Roanoke house. They’re filming everything, of course, so they can post the videos to Instagram and “blow up the internet.” They’re fans of “My Roanoke Nightmare,” and are discussing how it’s really a story about racism and patriarchy when the spooky stuff starts happening.They run into a bleeding woman, running through the woods. She keeps mentioning her car. They follow her, and they come to a clearing with an overturned car. The woman is nowhere to be found. Sophie checks inside the wrecked car and finds the dead body of the woman they were following.The next time we see the trio, they’re talking to the police. Apparently, when the cops investigated the car, they didn’t find the body. They think the kids are just screwing around and threaten to arrest them for trespassing if they go near the house again. Todd even laughs about how their situation is just like every horror movie. Well at least someone on this show watches them. Not that it’ll help them survive, of course.Meet the kids who show up for one episode and die horribly. (Photo: Screenshot via FX)We cut back to the Roanoke house, right where we left off last week. Dylan explains that he was given instructions by Sydney to show up at the front door with the pig head on to add a few scares to what he assumed would be a dry point in the season. Lee and Audrey convince him that all the horrific stuff they’ve experienced was real and that they need to go back to the Polk’s house. Dylan says he’ll draw on his military experience to lead them.At the Polk house, Audrey searches the barn and finds Monet, still alive and tied to a chair. Lee finds the tape and tries to delete the footage of her admitting to her ex-husband’s murder. Dylan stays outside to hotwire the Polks’ truck so they can make an escape. He manages to start the engine but is stabbed by one of the Polks from behind. So much for that military training. Lee walks out with the camera threatening to show the footage to the cops and turn the Polks in. They’re interrupted by the torch-wielding ghosts. The Polk brother drives away in the truck, and Lee drops the camera and runs off into the woods. Audrey and Monet run out of the barn to find Dylan dead and the camera on the ground. Audrey picks it up, and they escape.Monet and Audrey run back to the Roanoke house and argue over why they chose to do that. It’s not like they’re any safer inside. Monet realizes Lee is gone. Audrey says they have the camera and now they’ll be able to prove their innocence. They watch the tape and find out that Lee did, in fact, kill her ex. As they watch the tape, we see Lee stumbling through the woods. She meets Scathach, the forest spirit played by Lady Gaga in “My Roanoke Nightmare.” Scathach feeds Lee a heart, just as she did for The Butcher centuries ago.Audrey (Sarah Paulson) caught by Lee. (Photo: Screenshot via FX)The kids, meanwhile, are back in the woods trying to prove to their followers that they weren’t lying about the body. They run into Lee, who is not looking so great. She stabs Todd and chases the other two into the woods. They come across the production trailer and see the dead bodies outside. With Lee close behind, they run into the trailer and find they’re able to watch what’s going on at the Roanoke house on the monitors. They see that Lee has entered the house and is about to kill Audrey and Monet. Sophie calls the police, but surprise: The police don’t believe them. Sophie and Milo run to the house to save the actors.At the house, Audrey and Monet see that Lee has entered and confront her about the murder of her ex. Lee holds a cleaver and is talking a lot like The Butcher, but for whatever reason, that doesn’t seem to bother them. Monet says she’s not scared of Lee, but Lee pushes her over the banister and Audrey is impaled on a broken pillar. Guess I was wrong about her being the one to survive. Audrey escapes through the tunnel in the basement, but Lee is waiting for her on the other side. She slices into Audrey’s shoulder with her cleaver and leaves her on the floor of the tunnel.Sophie and Milo find the house, but stop when they see the torch-carrying figures in the front yard. They see Dylan, still alive for now, being dragged in front of the crowd. From his chest-mounted camera, we see his intestines torn out. Sophie and Milo turn to run, but are caught by Lee and dragged in front of the crowd. Lee has taken on the role of The Butcher. She stands at the center of the crowd as Sophie and Milo are impaled on wooden poles and burned alive.The only survivor of this season (Adina Porter). (Photo: Screenshot via FX)The next morning, the police arrive, having heard reports of a lynch mob from someone watching the kids’ live-stream over the internet. They find all the bodies, and Lee still alive. She begs them to get her out of there and the police help her into a car. They then see that Audrey is also still alive, though bleeding from her shoulder. She crawls towards the police, who help her towards the car. When she sees Lee, she flies into a rage, calls her a murderer, grabs the police officer’s gun and tries to shoot her. The cops open fire and kill Audrey. Lee, seemingly with no memory of the night before, is the one who survives.After last week’s horrifying and disturbing episode, this week seemed almost tame by comparison. Well, until the very end. Just when I thought American Horror Story had run out of disturbing ways to kill someone, they impale two people through the rectum (that is what was happening, right?) and set them on fire. As for the rest of the episode, it was a little light on scares and a little too heavy on the slasher cliches. Guess they were luring us into a false sense of complacency for that final scene.The real exciting part though is what happens next week. Everyone is dead except for one person that one person is finally getting away from the house and there’s still one episode to go. So where do they go from here? We’ve seen in a preview that Lee will be put on trial for her murders because I guess Ryan Murphy loves courtroom drama now. Knowing this show, that’s not all it’s going to be. But how do you make a trial scary? The final episode is shaping up to be something completely unexpected.last_img

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